Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Day 7 of the challenge

Day 7 — Write a letter to: Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush


Dear "sperm donor" - I haven't heard from you in 2 years, you sent what seemed to me as a half-hearted response to my email about our son. I find it very hard to believe that you really did care, or wanted to help me. And the fact that you didn't believe me about the child being yours just shows what a complete and total jerk you really are. Do you really think I had anything to gain by lying to you about a child I wasn't keeping? And the fact that you felt as if there was nothing you could offer me at the time pisses me off, you didn't give any support to me during the pregnancy, birth or placement. I don't mean monetary, I mean emotional. I never asked for money, I didn't even ask for emotional support. But a good man would have offered some, instead of pushing me aside, and telling me lies. Apparently you have a higher sperm count than you thought, and your poor gay friend was out a child, but here our 5 woman with a child that we didn't plan for.
You showed little disregard for me as a person, and only cared about covering your ass. Remember the email my friend sent to your then girlfriend, and the phone call you made to me, telling me to tell her it wasn't true. How low, I'm still so confused by that. Why wouldn't you have just come clean then. As much as I wanted to reach out to her and tell her it was true, I didn't. I'm not quite sure why I never told her, but I didn't. It wasn't for me to do, that was your mistake to tell her about. And I hope that it came back to bite you in your ass. 
And I don't doubt for a minute that there are other children, what I find hard to believe is that of the 4 other girls who claim to have had your child you didn't even know 2 of them. And hearing that you possibly have 4 other children around the same age as our son just solidifies my decision to have you sign over all rights and give him to another man who blows you out of the water. I couldn't have picked a better family for our son, and the fact that you will never know him is bittersweet. I hate that he'll never know what a truly awful human being you are, but I'm so glad he'll never know that as well. I don't plan on bad mouthing you to our son in the future, nor did I bad mouth you in the letter I wrote him before he was born that his parents have so he can read it. You might find that hard to believe, but I thought I'd let him make his own decisions about you. And who knows, years from his birth you might be a wonderful man, married and with children of your own. I hope that is the case, I hope you have seen the errors of your ways and I hope you one day find happiness. But I don't think you have yet.
I'm very happy with my life now, and I have a wonderful husband now, and he'll make a better father than  you will probably ever make. So thank you for being you, and giving me a  beautiful son.  

Tell me: A song that reminds you of a certain event



Our first dance at our reception - Boston's "Amanda" because my father told me that whoever I married had to learn this song by heart when he asked him if he could marry me. Lucky for Steven he didn't make him sing it, lol



I want to know: A photo that makes you happy.
this because it was the happiest day of my life, and it shows off my pretty flowers and shoes!



Tell me about Your dream wedding.
I thought I had my dream wedding all figured out, but my wedding with hubby was pretty good. It wasn't lavish or fancy, it was just family and very small. It's no secret that I would have wanted more, or done things somewhat differently, but I wouldn't change who I married, and I have decided that I no longer care how my wedding turned out, it's the marriage that matters. And I'm very happy with my husband and our life together. And that my friends, means more to me than any fancy wedding.  


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Thursday, February 10, 2011

Day 6 of the challenge..

Day 6 — Write a letter to: A stranger


To Everyone who has ever spoken ill of me and my decisions - because I can't think of a better way to express my disdain. I'm so tired of people thinking poorly of me because I have a son that I don't raise, that I did what I thought was best for him. And this is for those idiots who thought I only married my husband because I wanted to get my son back. Ya'll are all effing idiots. This is MY life and this is how I want to live it. Don't you think I've suffered enough from my mistakes, that I don't need ya'll going behind my back talking shit and saying things like that. First of all, ya'll are dumb and no nothing about adoptions. I can't change my mind. By the time I met my husband it was too late, by  the time we got married it was WAY too late. I only had 10 days to change my mind. Dec 11-21 2008, those were my dates to change my mind. After those 10 days there was no turning back. So way to show your stupidity.


For everyone who ever thought I was a bad person because of the adoption, think of it this way. I could have ended the pregnancy, terminated it, taken the life of an innocent child. Excuse me for having a few morals. Sure the way I got pregnant wasn't the best situation. I'm not proud of that, I don't regret it, but it was a mistake, one that I will have to live with for the rest of my life. So, I don't need ya'll beating me up for my decisions because I already do that to myself. Enough for everyone, so I don't need ya'll to help me with that. 


I don't need to justify my actions to ANYONE, and I don't appreciate the way people put a bad stigma on adoption and birth parents. Enough already, this is the 21st century and things are a lot different now than they were a long time ago. It isn't as taboo as it was years ago, there might still be homes for unwed mothers, and people might still feel forced into adoption, but the majority of birth parents go into this freely and willingly.

Tell me: A song that reminds you of somewhere



This song reminds me of the Kappa Alpha house and all those Thursday night parties I went to when I was at Lambuth University! <3



I want to know: Your favorite music video.


This one was hard....right now though, and I don't watch music videos that much, but this one is a favorite right now



Show me A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.

A Panda Bear
*image courtesy of swagbucks.com*


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Monday, February 7, 2011

Day 5 of the challenge

Day 5 — Write a letter to: Your dreams
Dear dreams - I wish you would come true on your own, and would require little to no work from me. But that just isn't possible, now is it? Well, let's try to get something attainable, okay? Let's stop setting me up for failure, because I feel like you're trying to ruin my life...so if you could just stop, that'd be great! kthnxbye

Tell me: A song that reminds you of someone


"Dear God" Avenged Sevenfold - reminds of my hubby every time, and it's the ringtone that plays when he calls, and it's the ringback tone he hears...


I want to know: Your favorite quote.


"I’m gonna smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m gonna laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m gonna let you go in style, and if it kills me- I’m gonna SMILE :]"


I want to see A photo of yourself two years ago.
March 29, 2009
(almost exactly 2 years ago)





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Day 4 of the challenge

Day 4 — Write a letter to: Your sibling (or closest relative)


Dear Siblings - I know I've not always been nice to you, or treated you fairly. And for that I'm sorry. But no matter what, you're family, and I love you. I'm very proud of both of you, and how you're turning out, you're making me proud to call you brother and sister! I hope you know you can come to me for anything. I'll do my best to help you. Love ya'll!!

Tell me: A song that makes you sad



Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA"



and also this one - SheDaisy's "Come Home Soon"




I want to know: Your favorite book.



These are my favorite BOOKS, I couldn't just pick one....lol...you should really check them out, they're great!





I want to see Your favorite photograph of your best friend.



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This is my bestest friend Emily! 
My other bestie is Melissa, but I don't have any pictures of her, so I'll just say HEY to my bestie!! 


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Friday, February 4, 2011

Day 3 of the challenge

Day 3 — Write a letter to: Your parents
We've had our ups and downs, but through it all, you've always been there for me. So thank you. I know I was a pain in the ass in middle school, and maybe even some of high school. And I know I've probably let ya'll down a few times, but I love you guys and will always love you guys. Thanks for everything.



Tell me: A song that makes you happy


This song is such an uplifting song, and has a great message, plus the video chokes me up a little....I love Katy Perry!




I want to know: Your favorite television program.



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*images courtesy of swagbucks.com and abc.com, collage made on photobucket.com*

(top row: Hawaii Five-0, Doogie Howser, MD, White Collar)
(middle row: Holly's World, Fairly Legal, Cougar Town)
(bottom row: General Hospital, Modern Family, Saved by the Bell)


Tell me Your idea of the perfect first date.
I'm gonna have to go with my first day weekend with the hubby...March 27-29, 2009
Friday - We went to Biba's Italian Restaurant in Soddy, then a movie, but I honestly can't remember which one, my memory SUCKS..
Saturday: Tennessee Aquarium and Downtown Chattanooga, we ate at Ruby Tuesdays downtown for lunch, I can't remember what else we did, as I said, my memory SUCKS....
Sunday: We went to church, and ate at Red Robin and stopped by Build-A-Bear, where he made me my panda bear, Artie (because the hubby is a Field Artillery Officer, hehe) before he had to head back home...

Us at the Aquarium
Artie back when he was all new and clean...
I should show you what he looks like after nearly 2 years, haha

Hands down, best date EVER!

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