Tuesday, November 30, 2010

The end of Adoption Awareness Month

So I feel like a huge ass for not finishing the blog challenge of posting every day for November. But I think to make up for it, I'll write about something profound, but I just can't think of anything.....hahaha

So with that being said, hope everyone had a wonderful month. I am so looking forward to the Christmas season! I just love it!!


Monday, November 29, 2010

Spreading Holiday Cheer One Card at a Time

Growing up my grandfather would ALWAYS get us together and have us pose for Christmas photos. And each year he’d get them made, they’d send theirs, and he’d give us a bunch to send. Well, I think as the kids got older it got harder to do. And so we stopped, but I’ve always loved the idea of Christmas photo cards.

This year, I think I want to send our own. We’re going to a ball on Friday, and I think that might be the perfect chance to get a good picture of the two of us, and I just know the moms would love to have a picture of us all dolled up. My husband in his dress blues and I will be in a formal dress.

So when looking through the card selection on shutterfly.com, I couldn’t pick one, I loved a lot of them, but finally I got my husband to help select one, and I think we finally found a card we both like. I’ll link to the ones we were looking at, but not tell you which one we’re getting, that might spoil the surprise for some! :)

I am also looking at the canvas wall art feature they have. Or maybe a calendar for the grandparents.

Shutterfly.com is giving away 50 free Christmas Cards for Bloggers, go here and fill out their form!!


Almost 2 years Already?!

Well, the whole blog everyday for Adoption Awareness was kinda shot to hell, oops...it happens, so I guess I'll just share the update I got, well, highlights, I don't post pictures of my son, the ones they send me are theirs, and they didn't give me permission to share them, and the only ones I share them with are family and very close friends. But I will share some things they shared with me.

He's almost 2 years old....he'll be 2 Dec 10...
-He has a great sense of humor, and is starting to get a 2 y/o attitude
-He's a tattletale - whenever his older brother does something wrong he runs and tells their mom
-He loves to dance, and has great rhythm
-He sleeps with a train or a car every night
-He LOVES candy, and was a doctor for Halloween
-He knows about 20 sign language signs
-He can say a handful of words and sentences, he has a physical therapist to help with his speech
-He is quite the little traveler still, they travel a lot, the last update I got they had gone to visit Chattanooga, and there were pictures of him at the park and children't museum.
-They've been to the beach several times, and they sent a picture of him and his brother sitting looking out to the ocean with the older brother's arm around him, it is precious! And then one of my son laying in the sand, it looks almost professional.
-There were some really great pictures, and I have a few favorites, there is one of him with a tootsie roll and he's got this expression of joy and hyperness, ha!
-He is such a ham, and every picture shows his personality so well. It is amazing to see how he's changed, and how big he's gotten.

It's really hard to believe that it will be 2 years soon. And with the happiness of getting this update, there is sadness that I have to wait 6 months to get more. I have to go get his ornament and I'm going to get some baby pictures of me made so I can send them, I've been meaning to do that for a while, I'm also going to send some wedding pictures. Along with a little letter and I got this really cute card for his birthday too.


Sunday, November 28, 2010

Free Photo Cards, why yes please

I found this from Katie, and I just couldn't believe my eyes! 

Shutterfly is giving bloggers 50 free Holiday cards, don't believe me, check it out here! They have a great selection, and super cute things!! Check it out here!

There are so many pretty designs, I'm going to have a hard time picking, I guess I'll have to get my husband involved, and get someone to get some good pictures of us for the ball, I think that would be a good picture to put on there, him in his blues, me in a pretty dress!! :)


Wednesday, November 24, 2010


Anyone who knows me knows that I am the worlds most forgetful person. That is why I'm awake at 5:30am....I forgot to put the hubby's pts in the dryer last night, and I feel like shit....so the award for worlds worse housewife goes to me....actually I'm sure there are worse housewives out there, might as well not make a big deal out of this. Mistakes happen, right....and who the hell turned off the buzzer on the washing machine? I don't think it was me, but then again, I am quite the forgetful one...


Monday, November 22, 2010

4. Watch 26 movies I've never seen starting with each letter of the Alphabet

So far I've only tackled 2 of the letters, and I'm gonna work on a third later....Y & T are the two I've done, so here are the movies...(These are movies I have not seen)

You Don't Mess with the Zohan & The Pick-Up Artist

I really liked The Pick-Up Artist more than the Zohan movie, but I love Adam Sandler, and I thought I might be able to get into it now, I tried to watch it a couple years ago, but I just couldn't get into it. And well, I couldn't now either, but I watched it, and there were places I laughed! I loved The Pick-Up Artist, old school Robert Downy Jr and Molly Ringwald, HEAVEN!!!


Sunday, November 21, 2010

62. 50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind

1. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are? 

2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? 
never trying

3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? 
Because we're scared
4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?

6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
Teaching or adoption counseling (mostly birthmoms though)

7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
I'd like to think I'm doing what I believe in...but I think I'm settling more...

8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
I don't think I'd change anything....

9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
I think I've controlled it a lot, as for what degree, I have no idea...

10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
A little of both

11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
Stand up for my friend, even it means upsetting the people I respect and admire!

12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
Why would I offer a newborn advice, they're not going to remember it later in life....

13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?

15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people?

16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?
Because we are all different, if we were all the same the world would be a boring place

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?
Gone to Italy, money

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
Italy, because I think it would be a fun place to live, and I've always wanted to go there

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
Yes, and no

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
joyful simpleton

22.Why are you, you?
Because of the things in my past, they make me who I am today

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
I try to be, I'm sure I've failed some people, but I try my best

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
losing touch with a friend near you, good friends can move away, but you can still be good friends.

25. What are you most grateful for?
My husband and my son

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
well, I don't like either option, but I think I'd rather lose the old, and be able to make new ones

27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?
Not yet, hoping it won't

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
Yes, it matters a lot

30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
Vacations in Virginia with my grandparents, because they were spent with my grandparents!

31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

32. If not now, then when?

33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
Yes, with some of my closest friends

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
Because they support different types of love and they fight over who's right and who's wrong

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
Yes, I think so

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
Since I don't have a job, then yes =P but if I had a job, then I probably wouldn't quit my job

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
Less work...

39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
my son

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
Truly living is where you actually live your life, and just being alive is going through the motions

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Right now
45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
Afraid of what the lesson is...

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
All the time

48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
my husband, and I would hope so

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
Probably not, I have a horrible memory!

50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? 
A little of both

Today's the Day

Today is National Adoption Awareness Day!

Nov. 20
Support your local adoption community by attending a ceremony. Now I have no clue what was done around my community for it, I'm going to go out on a limb and say absolutely nothing...and it's pretty sad that I didn't go looking for something, but to be honest, I slept til well after 1pm today...and I have not done any research to see what is going on in the community about adoption, I haven't looked for support groups, I've thought about it plenty, but I'm not sure if I want to put myself out there. It is no secret that I am a birth mom, but I am scared.

I know people judge me for it, and I know people think badly about my decision, they say rude things about me behind my back, and to others who know me. They've spread rumors and talked completely and utter CRAP about my situation and how I could ever do something like that. They don't care why I did it, they want to think badly of me for it, and so there really is no reason to tell them my reasoning. They're going to skew it into me being a selfish, unloving, uncaring person who just didn't want a child. I've seen it, I've heard it. People don't think that the stuff will get back to me, but it has. And it HURTS. I'm a very loving and caring person, and I do want children. And I never once thought about myself when I was making my adoption plan. It was all about how my child would be better off without me. It wasn't until after I had already made my mind up that I realized what this meant for me, in terms of making something for myself. And I never thought of my adoption plan as temporary, something I'd try to reverse once I found someone and got married. I was not looking to get married when I met my husband, marriage was the farthest thing from my mind, I was looking to go back to school, finish my degree, teach and then hopefully somewhere down the road get married. It just so happened I met my husband when my son was 2 months old and started dating him when he was only 3 months. By the time my husband and I got married it was far to late to change my mind about the adoption, there was no turning back on that. And anyone who knows something about adoption knows that it is very hard to get an adoption turned around. It would have cost a lot of money, taken a lot of time, and in the end, would have ended up being a completely and utter waste of time, money and energy. See, we did things by Georgia law, which allowed me to sign the papers in the hospital, and gave me 10 days to change my mind(quite a few states have this grace period.) After the 10 days you CANNOT withdraw your surrender.
(While looking to see which law we used, I found this to be quite interesting, it's from adoption.com, and it's about when consent to adopt can take place....
"Only two States (Alabama and Hawaii) allow the birth mother to consent before the birth of her child; however, the decision to consent must be reaffirmed after the child's birth."
Anyways, it made me giggle that people were saying I was going to try and get my son back now that I was married, they clearly don't know anything about adoption and how it works. I just don't get how people can be so uneducated about things. It's not like my son is in any harm or danger living with his parents, he's thriving and doing really well, so trying to get him back wouldn't be in his best interest, and would not only hurt him, but his family, and I could never do that to him or his family. Not to mention it wouldn't be fair to my husband, to ask him to raise a child that isn't his. Even though I know that if I had kept my son, and met my husband he would have done so willingly. And not that I think it is wrong to do that. I know many people who had children before they met their significant other and the s/o welcomed their children with open arms. Even being a better parent then the child's birth parent. So I know it can work. But this isn't what was meant to happen, I feel very strongly that I am living the life I was meant to live, and my son is living the life he was meant to live.

Even though I knew very early in my pregnancy that my son was meant for another family doesn't mean he is any less my son. But I just wasn't meant to raise him. And I am meant to raise children with my husband, our children. And I pray that one day I will get to raise children with him, because he will make the best father. If we have a girl he will be so tightly wrapped around her finger it isn't funny, same goes for any boys we have.


Friday, November 19, 2010

Negatives and Positives

I started following this birth mom, Stefanie, recently and in a post she wrote yesterday she asked for birth parent input, and so I quickly typed up and email and asked her how I could help, and it was all about the positive and negative things we, as birth parents, have heard.

So, this is kind of like my first guest appearance on a blog, and so I give you 19. Negative and Positive (Birthmom Edition)

Ya'll might remember the "How To" posts I did back in April, this is a lot like those posts, so here those are again, and someone asked me to do what not to say, so since it's Adoption Awareness Month I will write that up for ya'll.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3


Read two books a month - Novembers Picks

Number 36 on my list is to read a new book a month. And I'm trying to read books I haven't read yet, to broaden my book horizons. Here are the other challenges I've put on myself about reading, I'm going to have to remove one of my challenges, as it is the same as this one, except not new books, and well, I think it might be cheating if I use it too, oh wait, I'm going to do it too, so I will be reading a new book a month, and then I can pick another book I've already read to read too....(sorry for the think writing, lol)
  1. Read 10 new books
  2. Read 50 new books
  3. Read 101 books
  4. Read a book every month 

This month's book is "The Phantom of the Opera" by Gaston Leroux, I got it free for the Kindle, it is my favorite Opera, and I LOVE the movie, the book so far is pretty good. It was a little hard to get into. But I'm chugging along, when I read! ha!

Anyways, I also had started a Nora Roberts book, so I will finish that one as well, it is from the "Bridal Quartet", it's the third book, "Savor the Moment," the last book is "Happy Ever After" and it is suppose to come out this month(her site says Nov 2,) and I will be picking it up, as I've read all the others in the Quartet, but after I finish the third book.

I LOVE to read an entire series, and I have almost read every book in Fern Michaels "Sisterhood Series," I thought I had one left but it turns out she has 2 more to release in 2010 and one already set to come out in 2011. I will be getting the next one soon, as I don't want to get too far behind, as she seems to write a lot of these and keeps coming out with more. As of right now, there are 20 books in this series, and I've read all but 3...here is her site, she is one of my favorite authors, along with Nora Roberts.

If anyone wants to buy me something for Christmas, you can get me "Deja Vu," which is Book 19 in the "Sisterhood Series," and will be released Dec 28, 2010! And "Home Free," which is the 20th book, is scheduled to release April 1, 2011, which would be a great "sorry your husband is deployed or going to deploy soon" gift ;)


Thursday, November 18, 2010

Nov 17 & Some randomness

So when looking up what today's suggestion was something caught my eye, it was an article written to hopeful adoptive families, it was a guide for what to include in your letter to birth mothers. There was also a link to another article about what not to include in your letter, those were pretty informative, some of the suggestions I didn't agree with, but I figured I'd pass them along anyways, as they did touch on things I thought should be included and left out.

Nov 17
Email or call friends and family about upcoming adoption events. 

I have not been sleeping well lately. Right now as I type this it is almost 1am, and I'm WIDE awake, and I haven't had ANY caffeine, NONE...the last few nights it's been well after 1am when going to bed, which also means I'm not getting up in the morning until the afternoon. Which might be why I can't go to bed, but even if I take my meds at a reasonable time I'm still awake late, and when I go to lay down I toss and turn. I just don't get it. I wish I could sleep. At least go to bed at a decent hour. Oh well, hopefully I get back into a cycle.

I got shoes tonight, they're so pretty....they're going to look so great with my dress for the ball, and my jewelry! I'm just gonna give ya'll a sneak peek, I don't want to put pictures of my dress on here yet, but this is my shoes, and earrings, the necklace looks just like the earrings, that with red toe nails will look GREAT with my simple black dress!!! (The shoes are from Ross, $25!)

The ball is Dec. 3, I'll write about the ball later, I'm going to take my meds and lay down!


Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Nov 16 - Adoption Related Movies

I wrote yesterday about something that could have been taken the wrong way, and I wanted to set the record straight. I know after I said I was jealous I said that I was happy for pregnant people, especially my friends, but I wanted to tell ya'll that I really am happy, and that the jealousy I feel isn't huge, and it has no effect on how I feel towards my friends who are pregnant, and it definitely doesn't make my happiness for them any less significant. So, if you're a friend, and you're pregnant, please know that I am extremely happy for you and will adore your child(ren)! I just hope ya'll can understand that it is hard to see pregnant people, and that I would never try to make your pregnancies about me or my feelings, and that I was speaking in generals yesterday, and not about anyone specific, as I have several friends who are pregnant. I just wanted to put this out there before I get into my original post....
So the suggestion for today, coming from the calendar on adoption.com, as usual, is below, and I did some research for this one!! (all links are from imbd.com, I just typed in adoption as a keyword...and read the storyline)

Nov. 16
Watch an adoption-related movie with your family. 

A Place Called Home: An Adoption Story (2004)
Off And Running (2009)

A Family Is a Family Is a Family: A Rosie O'Donnell Celebration (TV 2010)

Romantic Comedy
Gigantic (2008) (not too sure about this one, might not be suitable for children...it is rated R)
The Tunnel of Love (1958) (might not be suitable for children, imbd.com didn't have a rating)

Love's Unending Legacy (2007)



Tuesday, November 16, 2010

How Will I Do It?

Kelsey, at A Birth Mother's Voice wrote about what it was like to raise children after placing children, To Have, Or Not To Have. And I wrote a comment to her that basically said I was in tears by the end of it because the first part felt as if I wrote it, and the last part gave me so much hope, since she is raising children now. And it made me aware of all the emotions I'm feeling about this topic, and how instead of just ignoring them, I should write them out and work through them.

One thing that I struggle with is being jealous of all pregnant woman, not because I want to be pregnant right now, because I am not ready for a baby right now. It's just hard to see, and it isn't a lack of happiness for them, because I have several friends who are expecting, and I couldn't be happier. But there are times when, and I've told a few friends, that there are only a handful of people who could tell me they're pregnant and not send me diving off a cliff. It just seems like lately, everyone around me is getting pregnant, and I know, it's our age, but still, it's hard to see, and it hurts. But this post is about my feelings towards raising my own children, and getting pregnant myself, and with my husband, not so much how other pregnancies make me feel, because that is a whole other ball of wax!

I'm terrified of becoming pregnant again. And I'd be lying if I told you it hasn't effected my marriage. I love my husband so much, and I feel bad for it, but I think I just kind of shut down when it comes to that aspect of our marriage. There's also a possibility that it's some of the medicine's I've been on, anti-depressants and mood stabilizers tend to lower your sex drive, but I think that most of it comes from my not wanting to become pregnant right now. Of course I'm in a loving, stable relationship, so if we were to get pregnant right now things would work out, but I don't know how I'd handle it. I am scared of what my reaction would be, how it would make me feel, what it would mean. And what it would mean, right at this moment, is that I'd be alone during the majority of the pregnancy and raising a child on my own for the first half of it's life, and that my husband would miss all those things. And I don't know how my son would react if he found out that the next child I had after him was born with their father in another country and not being around, when those were the reasons I placed my son. Sure my circumstances now are much difference, and my husband would be coming back, but I still can't help to think that. And I think Kelsey said that all a whole lot better than I did, "Knowing that I placed them, but raised other children after them?" (yes Kelsey, that is a question, and a good one at that) I'm sure a lot of birth moms feel the same way, and ask that same question, because we don't want to hurt our placed children, but for me, I placed him so he could have a better life than what I was able to give him at the time, and then decided that I wanted to do everything I could to make myself a better person, for him, and I think raising children with my husband would be a part of that, so I'd hope he'd be happy to see that I did move on, but at the same time I can't help but think what else would my son think, how would it make him feel to find out that he had younger siblings? Would he feel or think it meant I loved him less, or loved the children I raise more. Would I do those things, is that how I'd feel? Would I actually be capable of loving them the same, and would I be able to be a good mother to the children I have after placement?

Giving birth that first time was fairly easy, scheduled c-section, anxiety medicine as soon as he was born, and I didn't have to care for him at all in the hospital. I was rarely alone the whole time, aside from nights, which were the hardest, the night nurses weren't very nice, and the day after his birth was harder than the others because he had already been discharged, but I had friends in and out the whole time, which helped. I don't think I had time, or gave myself time, to process what exactly I was doing. I went into auto pilot, and sailed through it. But the next time, I'm not going to be able to just sail through it, auto pilot isn't going to be an option, sure I could get the anxiety medicine as soon as the baby is born, but will I need them? Will I be able to handle it all, as Kelsey said, "Would it bring it all back in a bad way, in a torturous way? Would I be forever thinking about all that I missed the first time around?" And to be honest, I'm not sure about the answers. I'm sure I won't go into the birth without talking to the doctors about this, and having a plan set in place in case I can't handle it, and I can only do so much to ward off those feelings, but those are real, and I think, legitimate fears. And I don't think I'll have the answers until I'm there in that moment. And even then, I might still not know. 

Until then, you just don't let those questions eat you alive, and you take those feelings and deal with them one at a time. And you really won't know the answers until you are pregnant again, and getting ready for the birth of the children you're going to raise. And even some of those won't be answered until a while after you bring new children into the world, because you might not be able to hear from your placed child. We as birth moms need to just trust that our children, all of them, will understand and love us just the same. And we will love all our children all the same, it's how we're wired, it's how God created us. 


Monday, November 15, 2010

Holiday Gift Guide Blog Hop - Week 2

Week 2 - Man Gifts

Be sure to go back to this blog and link up every week, or to just look for great ideas!

As for my husband I have no idea what to get him as he buys things for himself throughout the year, like video games, and music. Last year I got him some stocking stuffers of gift cards and bath room things, like shaving gel, razor blades, shampoo, body wash, etc. His "big" gift was a chocolate fountain, it was $10 and like a gag gift, we haven't used it yet, but it's a children's toy....

This year I have really no ideas what to get him...so I'm looking forward to seeing what other's are suggesting.

Some good places to look for gifts would be Current Catalog, they even have a whole section devoted for Gifts for Him

I signed up for this site to sell my stationery, and they have customizable things, and they have TIES! All sorts of Ties, and that is such a go to gift, but how neat would it be to get them a custom tie, that not many others would have....

The above site also has t-shirts and you can even customize your own products. It is FREE to use, and if you set things up to sell you make a certain percentage from all sales. I have a store, it's mainly stationery right now, and ornaments, but I will be adding more later, once I can figure out how to offer personalization.


Guest Blogger Kristen Davis: Unplanned Pregnancy: Limitations to Sexual Awareness in American Women

I got an email from Kristen Davis late last week, and she wanted to write an article for my blog, so I said, what the heck, I gave her some background on my readers and who I want to reach, and she came up with the following article. Thank you Kristen!

Unplanned Pregnancy: Limitations to Sexual Awareness in American Women

Sexuality is a major topic in America today because of all the possible health impacts that accompany an unplanned pregnancy. Unfortunately, too few women consider adoption a legitimate option when they find themselves confronted with this situation. Mothers who instead turn to abortion as a solution face a host of physical and mental consequences after having this procedure done. One in ten of these women will experience one of more of the over 100 complications seen after abortion, including infection, hemorrhaging and convulsions.
Obviously for young women that do not wish to have children yet, avoiding pregnancy remains the best option. However, doing so safely is not guaranteed either. While the popularity of certain birth control methods is undeniable based on their widespread use, these methods also bring forth a host of further risks. Unfortunately, teens tend to fixate on avoiding pregnancy, arguably because it’s the most visible consequence, without considering the physical dangers that accompany sexual activity. However, with such well-established and successful adoption programs in place to bring life to a family unable to have children, young women should focus less on pregnancy and instead recognize the threats to their health if they engage in unsafe sex. 
            One major factor to consider regarding oral contraceptives is the potentially dangerous implications users might acquire about these drugs. While oral contraceptives are up to 99% effective at preventing pregnancy, these products often mislead young adults into believing they are protected against sexually transmitted disease as well. While pregnancy rates for unmarried young women in this country are declining, sexually transmitted disease rates continue to grow. Frighteningly, these drugs might actually be a contributing factor to this trend as teens protected from pregnancy are emboldened to have unprotected sex.
            Unfortunately, schools might fail to address the dangers of these contraceptives in health-centered education classes. With the U.S. government’s renewal of its $50 million a year funding over the next five years for abstinence-focused education, teens might not receive the comprehensive information needed to make the right choice about birth control. Worse still, schools might totally refuse to discuss contraception because it conflicts with the curriculum’s assertion that abstinence should be the sole method teens use regarding sexuality. While promoting abstinence-focused education, schools might also alienate the very students they most need to reach as these sexually-active teens are potentially ignored.
            Less informative still, the manufacturers of contraceptives regularly fail to mention important information regarding their product’s safety, leading to further drug misconception. One producer, Bayer HealthCare, was recently cited by the FDA for having misleading television advertisements concerning its products. Promoting their product as a total quality-of-life aid, these ads further misled teens into choosing these drugs based on unproven claims. Furthermore, Bayer was cited for substandard conditions in a plant its ingredients were manufactured in. However, the drug company’s annual multi-million dollar advertising campaigns continue to overshadow these revelations and make its drugs the most popular form of contraception on the market for young women today.
Although this pharmaceutical manufacturer’s lack of corporate integrity is disturbing, the severe physical consequence of these drugs is even more striking. Oral contraceptives are hormone-altering pills and can actually lead to permanent side effects, like the possibility of infertility. Originally introduced in the 1960’s, evidence today links the use of these drugs with the rise of cancer seen in U.S. women.
In fact, the growing number of complaints against oral contraceptives, exemplified by pending Yaz lawsuits, indicates that the short-term safety of such birth control options is far from certain as well. Users of this particular product have seen serious, and sometimes fatal, side effects including heart attack, stroke, blood clots, pulmonary embolisms and gallbladder disease. However, because schools refuse to recognize anything but abstinence as a legitimate lifestyle, these facts are rarely discussed with teens.
A dangerous lack of information regarding birth control and adoption are the major limitations of sexual awareness in American youth today. Although sexual promiscuity and dangerous forms of contraception are perfectly acceptable and heavily endorsed in the media, the dignified, responsible act of adoption continues to have a strong stigma attached to it. However, like many social solutions, healthy answers to unplanned pregnancy will only occur if teens are empowered with actual information about adoption, birth control and abortion.


101 Things in 1001 Days

I found this idea from a fellow blogger and military spouse, Tracy, so I went to see what it was all about, and made my own list...it's 101 things in 1001 days, Day Zero Project is where you can sign up for it, and make your own list, they have it all set up so you can make notes on your items, and so you can "check" them off as you go. Right now, I'm 3% finished. I'm set to finish on August 12, 2013, which is 2.75 years from Nov. 14, 2010. I figured this would be something neat to do while my husband is deployed, and some are things we can do together before he leaves and when he gets back. 

The ones I've finished are crossed through, ones I'm working on are in italics, and everything else is just plain text. 

I'm going to copy and paste the list onto a page, so it will be easier to keep track of on here, and I will add them to my other blog too. 

Check out the site, and make your own day zero list, so I can cross off the first thing on mine!! =D Be sure to comment on here so I know, so I can cross it off!!
  1. Encourage a person to make a day zero list
  2. Write about each of these on blogger
  3. Give up something for Lent
  4. Watch 26 movies I've never seen starting with each letter of the Alphabet
  5. Get a tattoo
  6. Complete a 365 day photo challenge
  7. Make a wish at 11:11 on November 11, 2011
  8. Complete a coloring book
  9. Don't complain about anything for a week
  10. Send a secret to PostSecret
  11. Send Christmas cards
  12. Identify 101 things that make me happy
  13. Identify 101 things that make me unique
  14. Get professional photos done
  15. Find a personally inspirational quote and work it into a piece of art or home decor
  16. Find out my blood type
  17. Carve my name on a tree
  18. Make a birthday cake for someone
  19. Host a dinner party
  20. Make a custom recipe book
  21. Dye my hair
  22. Join a book club
  23. Start a holiday tradition
  24. Blog at least once a day for a month
  25. Bake an apple pie from scratch
  26. Read a book a month 
  27. Give someone a handmade gift
  28. Give up fast food for a month
  29. Read 10 new books
  30. Read 50 new books
  31. Read 101 books
  32. Write in a journal every day for a month
  33. Learn a song on the piano
  34. Go on a hike
  35. Make brownies
  36. Read a new book every month 
  37. Stay up for new year countdown with friends
  38. Meditate once a week
  39. Re-watch every episode of Sex and the City
  40. Learn some basic sign language
  41. Join Postcrossing.com and send 10 postcards
  42. Save $5 for every task I complete
  43. Go on a luxury cruise
  44. Don't swear for a week
  45. Meet a celebrity
  46. Make a sand castle
  47. Re-decorate the bathroom
  48. Read the entire Chronicles of Narnia
  49. Make my own pizza
  50. Eat 5 things I've never tried before
  51. Send 101 postcards via postcrossing.com
  52. Make a new recipe
  53. Get a massage
  54. Go on a cruise
  55. Visit three states I have never been to before
  56. Visit a museum
  57. Visit Las Vegas
  58. Donate $5 for each goal I DO complete
  59. Donate $5 for each goal I don't complete
  60. Visit Chicago
  61. Attend a Murder Mystery
  62. Answer the "50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind"
  63. Buy something from Etsy
  64. Bake cookies
  65. collect 101 postcards
  66. Complete the 5000 Question Survey
  67. Enter a photography contest
  68. Finish a book in a day
  69. See a comedian live
  70. Go to 5 different museums
  71. See a musical
  72. See 10 classic movies I've never seen 
  73. Host a game night
  74. Blog my months away 2010.
  75. Blog my months away 2011.
  76. Blog my months away 2012.
  77. Blog my months away 2013.
  78. Find a poem that means something to me and learn it by heart
  79. Visit a winery
  80. Get a new purse.
  81. Learn basic sign language
  82. Watch 10 foreign language films
  83. Host Thanksgiving dinner.
  84. Go to the dentist for a check up.
  85. Get back to a healthy weight.
  86. Pamper myself so I feel better about my body and my appearance.
  87. Start a video game and beat it. 
  88. Pay off my debts or at least get them into a good standing.
  89. Write to a pen pal monthly
  90. Watch a black and white movie.
  91. Have a visit with someone I haven't seen in years.
  92. Bake cookies for someone at Christmas.
  93. Write a letter to someone I admire
  94. Learn to play the piano.
  95. Ask 20 friends to suggest one book, and read them all
  96. Make a cheesecake
  97. Write a letter to myself to open in 10 years
  98. Send husband care package monthly while deployed
  99. Go home to visit
  100. Call my parents and grandparents weekly or biweekly
  101. Send an update to my son every 6 months

Nov 12, 13, 14, 15 - blogger fail

I can't believe I have failed to post every day, again, geez...I'm a blogger failure. But that's okay...I'm going to make up for it now....check out the calendar on adoption.com

Nov. 12
Send thank-you cards to your local foster care office. Sometimes a simple thank-you can go a long way! yellowpages.com is a good place to find the address of your local foster care office.

Nov. 13
Look into becoming a foster parent. Maybe when you're looking for the address on yellowpages.com they'll have a link to a site you can check out, that is surely to have a FAQ or check list, or something to help you find out how to become a foster parent, adoption.com is a great place to look as well.

Nov. 14
Celebrate your family by beginning or catching up on your scrapbooking. I will be doing this today, I am 1 update behind on my scrap book. There are so many neat things out there for scrapbooking. The internet is a great place to look, and if you have a printer you can print out some really neat things to use as well.

Nov. 15
Organize your own adoption event to have later in the month. Contacting local adoption agencies is a great way to start this. Facebook is a great way to get the word out there about your event, and have your friends share the event with their friends, and talk to local businesses about sponsoring. 

I am so sorry for the lack of posting. I guess time just got away from me, my husband was home for 4 days, so I spent a lot of that with him, because he is in the midst of preparing for a deployment, so I won't be able to spend much time with him in a few months.


Friday, November 12, 2010

Nov 11 - Make a Family Tree

I keep forgetting to link to the calendar...please forgive me, if I do forget, you can find it on a post that I actually posted it on, like this one, so here is the calendar.

Nov 11
Make a family tree that includes both adoptive and birth children. This may be hard if you don't have an open or semi open adoption, but even you can at least include the children's birth parents, and even the grandparents.

Here are some links with templates!!



Thursday, November 11, 2010

Veterans Day and something pretty big

So today is Veterans Day, and I just want to take a minute and thank those who have served, who serve, and those who gave their lives. Especially to my grandfather and husband.

Now I want to give ya'll a heads up, I am going to have a guest blogger. I got an email from this lady, Kristen Davis, in all my excitement and shear shock I forgot to ask where she is from, what site she's with or what. But she writes about women's health issues, and I gave her some background on what type of reader I want to reach, and what kind of reader I actually have, and she is going to write an article that speaks to, hopefully, all my readers. Be on the lookout in the next few days. She said she would have it emailed to me by tomorrow, so depending on when she gets it sent I might put it up tomorrow or Saturday. Either way, this is something that is new to me, and I'm hoping will be something I do often. 

I started this blog for myself, but then got to thinking that there might be girls who get themselves in situations like I did, who need guidance and help and support, and that is what I have tried to do here, and will continue to try to do.

I also want to talk about another email I got, it was from an adoptive mom who wanted to bounce some questions and such off me about her situation with their birth mom. I'm so honored that she felt comfortable with coming to me, and I just want to put it out there that if you have ANY questions, comments or concerns, PLEASE email me or leave a comment. I try to respond to all comments, and I really have no excuses for not, since I don't get that many right now. So I just want to thank this adoptive mom for feeling like it was something she could email me about, and to let everyone else know that it would be a great joy to answer questions, and I might not know all the answers, and what I have to say might not be what you wanted, but I'll answer and give my opinion to the best of my ability. My email address is located on a page, at the top of my blog, and if you would like me to email you, then leave your email as a comment and I'll get back to as soon as I can.


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Nov 10 - Brainstorm New Traditions

Nov 10
With your family, brainstorm and create a new family tradition. My husband and I have been doing this, seeing as we're newlyweds. And this would be a great idea if you have an open adoption where you include the birth families in things. Not only would it show the child that they are super loved, but it would make the birth parents feel like they're actually part of the family, and not just some people who allowed you to parent. I know that there have been times when I've felt like an incubator, and that that was the only thing they saw me as. But if you find things to do to include them, they'd feel less that way, and more inclined to get together with ya'll.

If you have a closed adoption then maybe you can figure something out that includes the children's heritage, and your own heritage. Make it all about the children and how special and loved they truly are.


Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Nov 8 & 9

So I meant to blog yesterday about adoption awareness, but the day just got away from me! So I'll do yesterday's and today's together because I really have no ideas how to go about yesterday's suggestion, lol...But you can find the calendar here

Nov 8
Ask your employer to look into adding adoption benefits to your existing benefits. This is a good idea, because adoption, when you're trying to adopt, can become quite expensive. And some places might not recognize adoption a child as having a child and may not give maternity or paternity leave, which means you might have to take unpaid time off, and that just doesn't seem like a good option when adoption already costs a lot. Or maybe you're lucky and have some paid vacation, but who wants to use paid vacation for anything BUT a vacation. So the only thing I can think to do is talk to whoever is in charge of that kind of thing, and if that doesn't work then maybe if you found some resources to show them then they'd be more likely to go along with it.

Nov 9
Have a get-together with members from all sides of the adoption triad. The way to go about this is to maybe get connected with your local adoption agency, and you can find the listing on adoption.com, here are all the Hawaii agencies listed on adoption.com, at the bottom of the page there is a "new search" option, so you can insert your state. It's probably pretty chilly on the mainland, so going to a park might not be the best option, but the agencies might be willing to host the get-together at their offices. I think for Hawaii going to a beach park and maybe grilling burgers and hot dogs might be a great idea. Be sure to include birth moms and birth fathers, and if they're now married and have children they're raising invite them too. Invite adopted children of all ages, even those married with their own children. And definitely don't forget the adoptive parents. And adoption professionals.



Monday, November 8, 2010

Holiday Gift Guide Blog Hop - Week 1

Be sure to go back to this blog and link up every week, or to just look for great ideas!

I don't own it, yet, but I am planning on getting it for my son at some point, is the book by Kelsey Stewart, it's The Best For You, it's written and illustrated by Kelsey herself, and it is a book written to her children that she placed for adoption. It is a wonderfully written explanation as to what lead her to make the decision to place, and it is a must have for all children affected by adoption.

One of my all time favorites, it's an ABC book, Chicka Chicka Boom Boom

(courtesy of amazon.com)

(both courtesy of amazon.com)

 some examples:
V is for Volunteer (which is the Tennessee book)
(courtesy of amazon.com)
A is for Aloha (which is the Hawaii book)
(courtesy of amazon.com)
P is for Peach (which is the Georgia book)
(courtesy of amazon.com)
There is also a Count Your Way Across the USA series, to go with the ABC books....

And you can never go wrong with an Eric Carle book!

Here are just a few suggestions, hope they prove usefull!!!!